We have already established that for the world, 2020 has a lot to be desired. It is the epitome of when things don't go as planned. Talk about having to be flexible and adjust accordingly. As I said in the last post, life continues and we bend and flex to make things work.
My youngest daughter started her junior year of high school today. My oldest daughter is moved into college and is in the midst of rush week. Thinking about my own college experience and now looking at it from the perspective of a parent, which is hard because in some ways, I was just at Colgate, right?? Well, twenty eight years ago, but still (wink, wink). The fact that I have the perspective now that my mom had then is something I could hardly imagine then and yet I am living it now, if that makes sense at all. But.....it is a process. Everything is a process. Life is a process. That comes into being now more than ever.
When I think of Sosie at school, I realize that this year is unprecedented. It is going to be different because it has to be. Though, for them it isn't different. It is their reality because they don't know of an experience other than this one.
I imagine my first moments in college - not knowing anyone, waiting to make the first connections, finding that first friend and not knowing what to do with my time. Being completely on my own with an unstructured schedule. I was the person who had a difficult transition. I didn't love being on my own from the beginning and in fact it took me awhile to get into my groove. I wished I was the person who jumped in and swam mightily, had no issues, didn't miss home and felt comfortable in my own skin. I was never really that person so I am not sure why I expected that at college. It took time. It was a process.
There were disappointments when I didn't make The Swinging Gates and there were amazing times when I joined my sorority and saw so many friends there. There were the moments I met my future roommate and we clicked in a beautiful way and there were the quiet moments I found a spot by the lake to enjoy the present of being on campus. It is a process. Truthfully, I didn't really find my happy places until I was out of college but I did find my groove. It took time, I dug deep (sometimes so so deep) and found the inner strength to find my way. I almost dropped out of Colgate my junior year but now I can't imagine having not been there. The connections I made in school and after college ended with people from Colgate are some of my longest lasting and they have made my life full. But it took time. It is a process.
So, whether you have the child who doesn't look back or the child who won't stop looking back, it is a process. For you as the mom, for your family who is adjusting to a new dynamic and for your young adult who is striking out on their own for the first time. It is a process. And processes take time. It also takes patience, flexibility, understanding, compassion, inclusion, friendship, love, support, prayers, kindness, and a sense of humor.
Put on American Teen by Khalid and let's get cooking.
For today, we are doing something a little different. It is summer still - it is August 10 and you need to plan your favorite summer meal. Some of your favorite things. Corn on the cob, a fresh heirloom tomato with basil and balsamic, a juice burger of choice, ice cream and enjoy every single bite.
Enjoy and have a happy day everyone!!
