The Power of One

I have been thinking and doing a lot of soul searching; pondering my role in my family, the community and on this beautiful Earth.  I am hyper focused on my flaws and mistakes and my challenges in life. I have always been very hard on myself. To a fault. I will say that I have also been doing a lot of thinking about friends and family (and the countless every day folks) who are taking small and large steps to help others and improve our earth. It is making me realize that the power of one is actually very large, even if the steps are small.

I have always believed that it is the little things in life that make a difference. The simple moments that define this blog. I started this blog many years ago with the notion that every day, at least once, you should try to be purely in the moment. At least once, be present in the here and now. Not on your phone. Not distracted by thought. Just present. A deep breath worth of clarity.  It can literally be 10 seconds of your day. But a moment to be here. There are definitely days, weeks and months where that is hard for me. I feel like so often I am on autopilot.

So two things have occurred in the last week. Spontaneously. Kelley and I were at Farmhaus, a local burger place, last Friday night. Neither one of us felt like cooking after watching a soccer game. We stood in line looking at the menu and the woman ahead of me asked what was good at the restaurant. It was her first time eating there and had just gotten off of work as she was wearing a fast food uniform. I explained that I liked a lot of things there but that they were known for their burgers. I told her that my husband liked the Haus Burger (or number 1). She read the menu and said that looked amazing and would order that and then asked what came with the burger. We joked that they needed a meal deal for dinner like she had at her restaurant since the additional money for french fries and a drink seemed like it added a fair amount more to the bill. After some more conversation, I told her that we would like to buy her dinner. She sat with us while her order was being prepared to go and we had a great conversation. We learned a lot about her - she had had two kidney transplants and that night was going to house sit at a friend's. It was such a refreshing moment. To spend time talking and getting to know someone, even briefly, that I might not have had the chance to know otherwise. And simply to do something nice for someone. Something that would change up their day. Even just a little. So often in life I feel powerless and as a natural born fixer, that is a tough feeling to have.

We are preparing our house for Masters and we needed to change out a blanket that had a hole in it. Instead of giving it to Goodwill, I decided today to take a detour on the way to work and give it to someone who might really need it. I went to a spot where many homeless live and I asked a gentleman if he would like it. He said that he would and I laid it on top of him, as he was lying down. I said that my name was Amy and that I hoped it would be helpful for him. He said my name a few times and as I left he called out, Amy! I turned around and said, "yes?". He looked at me and nodded and said, "Amy, thank you".

Both of those experiences were outside my normal comfort zone. I had never paid it forward by paying for someone else's meal and I hadn't ever driven specifically and spontaneously to drop a blanket off. The idea of doing something small to help someone else directly felt right. Just to enhance someone's day in some tiny way was something.  The ability to make someone feel good without wanting anything in return. I love when I see people raising money for a cause. I want to help them achieve their goal. I know many people who have gotten more involved in environmental and political causes of late. Things that are outside their everyday life. People taking the chance to get involved and make a change. Just a note to say that it is recognized and I am grateful for you.

Put on Union by The Black Eyed Peas and let's get cooking. So, I have not admittedly been doing a lot of cooking lately but I am hoping that all changes after Masters week. Today though I would like to repost an oldie but goodie. This was a weekly staple in our house until our daughter admitted she thought she was allergic to peppers (Doh!).  I absolutely love this recipe and it is very quick to make. I make it mild so it is more family friendly.

Click here for Thai Beef with Chiles Over Coconut Rice

Enjoy and have a happy day!

When life gives you lemons.......go to Jamaica? Ya, mon!!!!

When life gives you lemons, go to Jamaica? This has been an eventful fall/winter to say the least and one that has challenged our family in ways I didn't know was possible. But everyone has challenging times and it is during those times that you grow and change the most. Some of you are going through those times right now. Some have in the past and some will in the future. In these times, you learn about your environment, your relationships, who you can and cannot rely on and mostly about your inner strength. What you are capable of handling seems to expand when it is necessary. And then you grow as a person as well. I can say in my 48 years I have not stopped learning from my many mistakes and challenges and I hope that is the case in my future years. That does not mean it is easy and it does not mean that you don't take steps forward and many, many steps backwards in the process but it sure does help you grow. I have said before that Buddhism suggests that struggling is what binds us together as humans. I know that on the surface it may seem like everyone is happy and living the best life but to be a little more real, a little more honest is not a bad thing. It isn't a sign of weakness. It is actually a sign of strength. Reaching out for help is not a bad thing. You may not get the results you strive for but you learn from that too. Life isn't always going to be cherries and that is okay. 

So, we spontaneously went to Jamaica. One week we decided we needed to feel warm sun and see the ocean and we were very fortunate to be able to do so. I felt incredibly lucky and grateful that we were able to do something like this - and thoughtful of those that cannot. It was financially irresponsible of course (not in the budget!) but it did feel good to be together and away, for even a few short days. 

Something did happen this winter though that brought me back 12 years. Yes, 12 years. In a single moment. Many moons ago, I commuted by train for about 10 years. It was a 25-30 minute ride. When you take the train, most people wait in the same spot for the train, sit in the same car and usually the same seat so you get to know people that you are traveling with quite a bit. I have made some of my closest friends to this day on the train. 

One person that I got to know was named Ted Dooley. He worked for the Superintendent of Schools for Boston and lived in Needham, like me. We knew each other over the course of time when I was pregnant and with small kids. His kids were in high school and going to college. I always loved talking to him because he would share life lessons about his family and living with kids at the ages of sex, drugs and rock n roll, whereas I was dealing with small kid issues. We had an easy and great friendship. I learned a lot from him and I respected him in a tremendous way. His wife worked with a friend of mine and there was that common connection as well. 

Ted was an avid runner-never missed a day in the work week and his daughter was an incredibly talented soccer player. She was actively being recruited when I knew him and ended up playing for Columbia. 

Over time, I switched positions and my train schedule changed. I had not seen him in over a year. I found out through that mutual friend that Ted had died suddenly a year prior of a heart attack, the day after finishing a novel. The year he passed was 2006. When I learned of his passing, I was pretty devastated and I wrote a note to his wife (whom I didn’t know). I left it in their mailbox and always wondered if she had received it.

A few weeks ago, in 2019, I received a phone call completely out of the blue from Ted's wife saying that she had in fact received my note and had kept it all these years. She wanted to drop off the book Ted finished right before his death, which she had just gotten published. When she realized I wasn’t in the area, I quickly told her I’d buy it on Amazon and I read it in a day. It is called The Bicycle Kick. It is an easy read and one with a wonderful theme and story. I can't recommend it highly enough. In a bicycle kick, you turn your body upside down to kick the ball. Your life can change in an instant. Just like a bicycle kick. Your life can bring you challenges but you grow and change with those challenges. This book is a great representation of that. 

Time to put on Run Right Back by Moon Taxi and let's get cooking. 

OK - so I am going to input a link here to the best Shrimp Tacos!!! Sooooooooo good. Everyday Dorie is a cookbook that my sister in law told me about and I have really enjoyed reading and trying some of the recipes. This recipe takes a little bit of time so don't make when you need to cook a quick meal. Maybe an hour is needed. My mother in law made them and then I did too. They were a huge hit and I can't wait to make them again. 

Click here for SHRIMP TACOS!!!!

Enjoy and have a happy day, everyone!

Fall into Winter: Time and Soup

It is the holiday season!!! The years fly by as the days trickle sometimes. Amazing how time can appear to people. This fall was marked by lots of change. Many of my peers are part of the sandwich generation - taking care of their own children but then also taking care of parents (or grandparents). This is an incredibly stressful and difficult situation but also pretty special because it brings families closer together. My brother and I flew to PA to help my mom move my dad into a residential center for memory care. The night before we moved him I had a moment where I thought my dad has been in this house with my mom for the past 48 years and with my mom years more. What a change this will be, for everyone. It was a moment where I allowed myself to sit with that thought. First of all, it was the first time my brother and I were alone with my parents in our childhood home alone without kids and spouses in decades. That was in and of itself a funny time - falling into old habits and old roles. Then, take on the task of moving dad and that added an interesting dynamic.

I realized that I needed to nest the space where he would be living. I wanted him (and my mom) to feel comfortable and safe and happy and feel like it was a new home. The first time I walked in the room was very sad for me. It was so stark and cold. After lots of love and runs to home and nearby stores, we were able to make it so much better. Mom took great care in making his box for outside of his room (that way he knows it is his room). Here are some before and after shots.

It truly is a strange time. Mourning an incredible man while he is still living. Loving a person who is changing every day and with every breath is losing more of the person we knew all of our lives. But, appreciating the parts of him that are still there but exhibiting differently. I hate that this is how people will remember my dad but I hope that people still see him when they look deep into his eyes and see the dad that will always be there, somewhere.

Time to put on Like Gold by Vance Joy and let's get cooking!!

This recipe. Oh this recipe. It is such a favorite and I have only started making it myself recently. My friend, Rebecca, makes this and every time I want to eat the entire pot, er….bowl. It is so delicious and comforting and since we have moved into another house (yes, our 3rd in 5 years), I have made it several times. This is the first time I am posting a picture of the recipe because I love how worn it is. I love how we know it as tortilla soup but the recipe calls it something different. I love how Rebecca has changed the recipe and made it her own. I love that this soup evokes emotions and memories and brings a smile instantly to my face. It is a perfect fall/winter meal. Enjoy!!!!

Here are some shots of the soup preparation and finished meal....

Have a wonderful day everyone and happy cooking!!!

When you can't think of a title for your blog post......

 

My last blog post was written on July 20 which in truth seems like a lifetime ago. And what an incredible testament to Allison's impact on people was proven by the sheer numbers who read a little post about an amazing and beautiful person. My blog usually renders about 200-550 reads a post. The post about Allison reached over 1500 reads. That to me said so much about the person she was. I am forever grateful to have known you, my friend.

Since my last post, my friend, Tim, passed away from cancer. The same cancer that McCain and Kennedy experienced. His services were on Friday and I was very upset to miss them. He was a man I had deep respect for and he was a true gentleman in the real sense of the word. As my friend Doris said, he was one of the good guys and there aren't a ton of good guys in the world. It breaks my heart that he has left this world too young because the world was a better place with him in it. And I am so incredibly appreciative that I knew you, Tim, because you taught me a great deal about what is important in life and what it means to be a good person.

So, of course, these kinds of life events give me pause. They make me think about the world and about struggles we all face in life. It makes me think about the balance of thinking about life and analyzing life versus just living it. Just being. The balance of letting things fall off your shoulders versus holding them inside. The balance of letting emotions land inside and stick there, feeling powerless to control. The feelings of being numb because if you start allowing the emotions in, will they ever leave. The balance of wanting to connect with the community through social media and understanding the image that is being presented in that space. Balancing seeing in those many forums the image of the perfect life and what you are missing out on because you weren't included or were not there and being happy for the people that they are able to have that experience. Those feelings affect people of all ages.

Going back to the balance of analyzing life versus living it. That is a tough one. It is tough to realize your role in your own happiness because sometimes you feel out of control of your own emotions. They control you instead of you controlling them. And that can be incredibly overwhelming and even make you feel very alone and foggy. They can make you feel like you are just going through the motions of life instead of truly living it. From experience, I know this. And it is very difficult to then figure out how to take back that control. To think outward instead of inward and to realize you aren't alone and that everyone struggles. Sometimes the seemingly happiest people are the ones that struggle the most.  To grasp that life is a real gift is something we all take for granted at some point in our lives. To grasp that life can change in a single instant and to appreciate all that is here, good and bad, is so important and yet so challenging at times. To be able to gain perspective of yourself as being your spine and your center and that the pressures can create tension and pain but that you need to breathe. You need to give yourself space. You need to feel the emotions but then understand them and step outside of yourself and watch them pass by, leaving you lighter.

I think of the image of teenagers in high school and college whose image was of a kid with angst and drama and figuring themselves out yet their shoulders were relaxed because they weren't dealing with "real life" yet. Young adults being all emotion but enjoying the extreme highs along with the extreme lows. Freedom from real life and real responsibility so emotions are more raw and unbridled. I think that that reality has changed over time. I think that shoulders and backs are a bit more heavy.  Pressures can be more pronounced and kids feel things a lot more deeply now, earlier than ever. I think that is very sad and I wish I could take that away. Kids can also be awful to each other in a way that cuts to the core and we hold onto those experiences as adults. Whether you were the person hurting or the person being hurt. Adults have the upper hand because we have the life experience and the ability to see the big picture over time. Kids are stuck in the moment. Compassion and tenderness for all goes a long way in this world yet I think that is the first thing we all forget.

Sometimes I wish we could all just be...…..Appreciate and just be. Together.

Put on Monster by Mumford and Sons and let's get cooking.

I went to my friend's house for dinner a few weeks ago and had a shrimp dish that I quietly (or not so quietly) became completely obsessed with throughout the course of the night. So obsessed that I made it the following week and pretty much ate the entire thing by myself. 

Simple Marinated Shrimp, Taste of Home

Ingredients

·         2 pounds cooked medium shrimp, peeled and deveined

·         1 medium red onion, sliced and separated into rings

·         2 medium lemons, cut into slices

·         1 cup pitted ripe olives, drained

·         1/2 cup olive oil

·         1/3 cup minced fresh parsley

·         3 tablespoons lemon juice

·         3 tablespoons red wine vinegar

·         1 garlic clove, minced

·         1 bay leaf

·         1 tablespoon minced fresh basil or 1 teaspoon dried basil

·         1 teaspoon salt

·         1 teaspoon ground mustard

·         1/4 teaspoon pepper

In a 3-qt glass serving bowl, combine the shrimp, onion, lemons and olives. In a jar with a tight-fitting lid, combine the remaining ingredients; shake well. Pour over shrimp mixture and stir gently to coat,

Cover and refrigerate for 24 hours, stirring occasionally. Discard bay leaf before serving. 

Enjoy and have a happy day, everyone. 

Allison and the Outlaws! An ode to a true rock star!!

These are the outlaws. Not all of the outlaws are present in the picture but it is important to understand that we are represented in the Grossman Spicer family! (Smiling Broadly).

I am writing two blogs in five days. I guess I have to work through a fair amount this week. Today, I am writing because this popped up in my email yesterday.

My entire day was spent thinking about Allison and what an incredible person she is, and how she is a true inspiration to so many people. How she is an inspiration to me. I am not adequately able to express my emotions here but I will try. I frequently call Allison a rock star. Her fight has been long. Her fight has been beautiful. Her fight has been from deep within. She has had to face mortality at too young of an age (and all that entails) and she has never wavered in her strength and determination. In all the hard times and better times, Allison has never stopped reaching out. Allison has never stopped living. Allison has never stopped creating new experiences for her and her family. (By the way, Allison is the outlaw in blue in the picture above.)

I think about when my kids were very young and decided three days before the Breast Cancer walk that they wanted to participate. We gently told the girls that was not possible because one needed to train for such a walk but that we could go to the start and see Allison and her team. Allison's smile was bright. Her shoulders were broad and there was a glow emanating from her that was unmistakable. That day, Sosie and Sage's eyes were widened. Their hearts were huge and they felt grateful to just be there and see her. They understood the meaning at a very young age. It was a moment.

I think about when I personally was struggling and I was really struggling. It was a dark time for me. Allison took time to help me. She reached out to me. In all of the complexities and challenges of her own life, she took the time to reach out. What she said was so profound and so helpful on many levels. Those words and actions affect me to this day. It also helped me look beyond me. It made me look beyond what I was dealing with and in retrospect it was crucial to getting better.

I think about when I first met Allison and how we immediately clicked. We always wished we lived closer because there was a sense of a real closeness there. A potential of something and somehow knowing that potential has been incredibly comforting. Allison is the wife of Kelley's cousin, Charlie. They have two sons and have been through it yet they are together. They are real.

I think of the family events, happy and sad, where we have been together. I think of the moments where we chatted about families, kids and life in general. I think of the times we were just in the same room. I think of the laughter and tears.

I think about Allison, Shannon and I at the wedding where the outlaw picture was taken above. We had a great moment outside sitting at a table. It was a beautiful night and we had such a meaningful conversation among all of the fun and revelry.

I think about this world. This crazy, crazy world, seemingly crazier by the day, if that is even possible. I think about the nastiness of the world. But then I think about Allison. I think about how she is to others. How kind and thoughtful. How strong she is to face something no one should ever have to face especially at this stage in her life. I am angry and incredibly sad that she is in this position but then I think of her. She is an example of how one should live in the moment. How one should be kind, face challenges head on, hold on to the positives of life, connect with the people that are meaningful to you, think of others and live life fully. I love her. She is my hero. She is a rock star. She is.

In Allison's words, "Listen to Once A Day and I'm Alive and Shake it, Shake it Shake it! by Michael Franti and Spearhead. So good!" and let's get cooking. 

I am getting ready for vacation in the mountains at Lake Toxaway. I am making bbq sauce and ribs for the first night. I  have blogged about this in the past so thought I would repeat it. My friend and co-vacationer was able to recall the exact blog post and so it was easy to find!

Click Here to go to the recipe for Barefoot Contessa's BC Barbecue Sauce
The sauce goes on so many things and is so versatile. I can't wait for my second meal with it. 

Have a happy day, everyone!

Musings from an airport

Ok so this is going to be a different kind of blog post. I’m sitting in an airport in Pennsylvania, waiting seemingly endlessly for my flight to Charlotte. So far there have been 10 changes to my flight and now it is very possible that I won’t make my 10:30 pm connection in Charlotte to Augusta.

So what does one do with all of this time?? I will say it is a definite challenge to my level of patience. After vacillating between anger, frustration and insanity, I have opened my tiny browser on my phone, put on Pandora and have started to write. I have found peace.

After my last post I hit a writing snag so I didn’t write for a few weeks. I wasn’t sure what to write about in my next post.  A writing block of sorts. A friend had defriended me on Facebook I believe as a result of my post which surprised me and made me a little sad. It sounds so weird to write this at the age of 47. Someone defriended me on Facebook. I do so enjoy writing yet I do feel feel nervous putting myself out there in the blogosphere. I do feel badly if someone is upset by my writing or experiences. They are my own and I only speak for me. One of my goals in this life is to connect people, not divide, and I apologize if my last post divided in some way.

Back to the reason of why I am sitting in an airport for hours. I was in Bethlehem visiting my parents for a few days and wouldn’t have missed the opportunity to spend time here, even with this horrendous delay. I’m grateful for the ability to see them. I’m grateful for my husband and kids for giving me the time to come. I’m grateful for the ability to hear my mom share a story or talk about a book she is reading or share an hour watching one of her television programs or have lunch out at our favorite restaurant. I’m grateful for the ability to walk a block to the nearby farm market and pick fresh, local fruit, vegetables and flowers for my mom. I’m grateful for the ability to give her a little help at home. I’m grateful for the opportunity to have my dad look in my eyes in a particularly lucid moment and say he wished he could be with me when my mom dropped me off at the airport. The visit always flies and grateful for the opportunity.

I’m grateful. I’m grateful for my family and my friends and my life and my history, hard times and happy times. I’m grateful for different experiences, cultures, opinions, religions,, pretty much everything. I’m grateful for all differences because that’s what makes us unique. Looking into the differences you find the similarities that bind us.

This blog has been about finding a moment every day where you are truly present. I guess I found my moment today.

Put on two songs and let’s get cooking! Wagon Wheel by Old Crow Medicine Show and First Class by Rainbow Kitten Surprise.

Seeing as I can’t quite figure out how to add photos in this format I thought I’d talk about outdoor dining. We recently went to Boston to visit friends and family. We had many experiences dining outdoors. Many meals. Many different settings. There is something incredibly wonderful about being outside and sharing a meal. Sometimes I have a hard time because of my anti relationship to biting insects but it is so worth it. There’s space. There’s a lovely backdrop. There’s fresh air.  It somehow feels more alive. Light some candles. Mix a cocktail or a mocktail and enjoy the solitude or the company. Take a deep breath and smile from within.

Thank you for indulging me with my thoughts (and typos) as I still sit waiting for my plane.  Have a wonderful evening.

The things we hold onto...

The things we all hold onto affect us deeply.

From the way someone's tone sounded when they said something to you to someone cutting you off when driving. From the feeling that you aren't being appreciated at work or home to a mistake you made that is still with you. From the moment that shaped you as a child to the way it still affects your relationships as an adult. From the deep anger at something that happened to you to the shakiness you feel when you see someone who has hurt you to your core. From the silly error in judgement to the stupid thing you said when you had other things on your mind. From the look someone gave you to the subtle way they asked you a question.

The things we all hold onto affect us deeply.

It is time.
It is time.

"Turn your face towards the sun. Let the shadows fall behind you. Don't look back, just carry on. And the shadows will never find you." Rihanna

I have been thinking so much about the emotions I carry that play a role in my actions and the ones other carry on their shoulders. In our school community there has been a vocal minority that has been a negative presence for over a year. Anger and resentment hasfueled plain ugliness. Communities have sought to be destroyed. Minds have been closed and it has been a weight for everyone on all sides (and there are sides), most especially the kids. It is time. It is time for people who are unhappy to find their own way and let everyone else live and grow and thrive. I want the unhappy people to find their happy. I want their shoulders to lift and breathe in the beautiful fresh air. I want the school community, MY school community, to be the best they can be and it to fully heal, and to be able to heal. I want everyone to have altruistic reasons for their actions. This world needs more kindness. This world needs to have us all think of each other.

There have been two "celebrity" suicides within the last week. Suicide is such a complex and poignant example of holding onto things. Things that weigh you down so much that the alternative to living is more desirable. The desperation and the emptiness one must feel to remove themselves from this earth. Seeing and knowing that people who are in the public eye have those same problems of anxiety and depression spotlights the mental illness issue. But the issue is there always. I remember when a student committed suicide at Prep within the last couple of years. I was blogging then. Here is an excerpt.
___________________________________

My heart is very heavy today.

A student from school committed suicide last night. It is always shocking and it is always heartbreaking when something like this happens, especially in your own communities. Lately, I have been hearing so much about kids all over the country, big schools, small schools, public and private, who are doing things to hurt themselves and then this.....it is so heartbreaking on so many different levels.

For me, I think of the complete desperation one must feel.

For me, I send my deepest compassion to all of the families who deal with depression and anxiety in their kids every day, and especially to those whose children take their own lives.

For me, I send love and deep strength to all of the kids who feel so alone.

For me, I think of my peer in my high school who took her life and the deep effects it had on our own small community.

For me, I think of my cousin, Edward.

For me, I think of my kids and how they will handle this tragic news.

For me, I want kids to be kids for as long as humanly possible.

For me, I think of the increasing pressure kids feel every day. The weight you have on your shoulders to do more, be more, be the best in sports, be the prettiest or most handsome, get the best grades, do as many activities as you possibly can. Then, completely differentiate yourself from your peers so that you can get into a good college, then grad school. That way you can get a great job that pays a lot of money and then you will be happy. It is exhausting just thinking about it.

For me, all I want to do is give my girls a hug. Let them know I love them, and am always here for them, unconditionally, and am so proud they are my daughters. I am grateful I get to be their mom. If they need to talk to someone and it can't be me, that is totally fine! As long as they talk. As long as it is someone they can trust.

For me, I want mental health to become a priority in this country. Let therapy become a normal thing instead of having a stigma attached to it. Instead of being something not discussed, bring it into the open. It is hard growing up. It is hard for parents to parent! Parents have never been parents until they are in fact, parents! I am not going to do everything right and they aren't going to everything right as kids. It is a growing process as families to be together, figuring it out, as we go. A little extra help along the way is a very good thing.

For me, I need to acknowledge the sadness I feel. I don't know this particular family but I still feel very sad. I send love, support, and deepest thoughts and concern to all who loved her, all who knew her, and hope that happy memories as well as compassion fill the voids left in their hearts.

For me, I want to yell from the tree tops that no one is alone. There is always help. No matter how sad you are, how alone you are, you are truly never alone. There is always someone who can help.

For me, I want all my friends and families to know that they are loved. You are special and you are never alone.

For me, I realize that in time, life moves on. It has to. The sun will set, the sun will rise. With each passing moment, I take hold. I realize that life is so fragile and so fleeting. You must grab the simple moments where you can, grab your place in time and cherish it. Hold onto it. Suck the marrow from it. Seize the day. Seize the moment. 

________________________________________

These are the times when we need to all find space, breathe deeply, realize our connections to each other, COMMUNICATE, have those difficult conversations so that we can release what holds us down and be together. We can disagree. We can have different outlooks on life. We can have different politics or religious beliefs. But we need to be open minded and we need to respect each other. Letting go allows for this.

It is amazing that we have been in Augusta for almost 5 years. It took me almost 4 years to feel comfortable in this new place. I miss being around family. I miss being around people who have known me for decades. I miss family friends where our kids have grown up together, where people really know ME. I question all the time, was this the right thing for me, for us, for our family that we moved and have stayed down here? Knowing how our leaving has affected everyone in our lives and how leaving them affected us as well. Life is hard. Everywhere. It is also a gift, even in the places you don't expect, it is still a gift. Learning different ways of life expands the mind. Seeing a different part of the country or the world opens your eyes to options. Being here isn't always easy but it is all part of this amazing journey we are on in this lifetime. Home is inside you. Sometimes I have a hard time finding that moment of calm, of feeling settled, of peace. But it is there, waiting. Each simple moment.

Now put on One Red Thread by Blind Pilot and let's get cooking.

One of my favorite foods of summer especially is pesto. The smell of basil and garlic and cheese is quite intoxicating. Like chimichurri, you can add anything to pesto. The flavors blend and feel like that breath of fresh air or the yoga pose that brings you an epiphany.

Pesto, by Ina Garten 
Ingredients
1/4 cup walnuts

1/4 cup pignolis (pine nuts)

3 tablespoons chopped garlic (9 cloves) (I use less)
5 cups fresh basil leaves, packed
1 teaspoon kosher salt (I omit)
1 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
1 1/2 cups good olive oil (I go by taste)
1 cup freshly grated Parmesan  (I use more)

Directions

Place the walnuts, pignolis, and garlic in the bowl of a food processor fitted with a steel blade. Process for 15 seconds. Add the basil leaves, salt, and pepper. With the processor running, slowly pour the olive oil into the bowl through the feed tube and process until the pesto is thoroughly pureed. Add the Parmesan and puree for a minute. Use right away or store the pesto in the refrigerator or freezer with a thin film of olive oil on top.

Enjoy and have a happy day, everyone...…